Wednesday, November 25, 2009

a new home for my bottom

since i'm now a big-shot law student, i decided that it was high time to spoil myself. up until earlier today, the only pieces of furniture in my apartment were a computer chair, computer desk, non-computer desk, and card table, which should really be called a things table, because it's where i put my things, not my cards.

i needed a couch. you know, something on which to sit and think law school thoughts, like what the rules of discovery are, the original intent of the Framers in constructing the Bill of Rights, and how if you place the delicious icing layers of 4 oreos within the boundaries of the delicious cookie layers of 1 oreo, you create something so beautiful and deliciousy that it makes you wet your pants out of anticipation of consumption.

so i went out and found the most expensive, luxurious, refined, comfortable, and distinguished couch in my parent's garage, and it was delivered to me today. the first picture is of me playing COD:MW2 as i try to stay awake despite the couch's best efforts to convince me that it was sleepytyme. the second picture is of me having succumbed to the will of my new love seat. the second picture is also of my disproportionately long left leg which would falsely suggest that i am over 7 feet tall.

my radass little brother Andy™ is staying the night, and tomorrow we're heading out with my parents to visit our Family To The North. Andy™ and i watched the first half of The Jerk, during which time i spilled crumbs into the crevassesess of the couch, which is my way of marking my new territory. i also peed a little on one of the cushions just so any dogs that happen to visit will know what belongs to me.

p.s. this is the first blog post, but hopefully not the last, where i mention urinating TWO TIMES.